Robert Morley says, “To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness.” It seems that everything starts with this foundation of how you view yourself, and the happiness you create in life is often dependant on how much love you allow yourself.
The way you view yourself is the lens through which you view your entire life. If you are bathing yourself in love, you will find love when you look out. If you are allowing self-hatred, you will find the same as you look out.
Learning to love yourself is learning to live well.
Never underestimate how much of an impact self-investment will have on every aspect of your life.
Self-love is realizing that you matter.
It is a feeling that you are enough just as you are.
It is also the practices you create to help you remember this truth. There are countless practices to do just that.
Notice the things that make you feel full and choose to do more of them often.
Do you ever find yourself stuck in the trap of comparison? You know what it looks like. You are scrolling through your social media feeds and before you know it, you find yourself thinking things like “if only my life looked like that,” or “if only my body looked like hers.”
This feeling of not being good enough when compared to someone else is not really about the other person.
It is usually about the energy you are giving away to that person by mindlessly obsessing over what they have and as a result what you imagine you do not have.
To combat this envy game, invite yourself to notice how you feel when you are in that place.
Do you feel connected to yourself?
How is your breath?
What is happening in your body?
Instead of diving deeper into that rabbit hole of envy, ask yourself what you could do in this moment to bring more connection to your own power.
What could you do to invite deeper breaths?
What could you do to soften your body?
Maybe it is shutting off the screen and meditating. Maybe it is going for a walk with a friend who makes you feel really amazing about who you are.
Choosing to focus on what you have, rather than what you don’t, will help you build more love for yourself and less envy for others.
If negative thought patterns seem to run through your head constantly, learning to affirm yourself will help reprogram your mind to think new thoughts that support who you want to be.
Positive affirmations can be used in the morning as you breathe, get dressed, brush your teeth, drive to work, or wherever else you want to incorporate them.
Attaching your affirmation practice to a habit that is already routine, like brushing your teeth, will assure that you do it.
Writing your affirmations on small notes and putting them in the areas you will be in will remind you to stay with it even when you don’t want to.
Try adding them to your steering wheel, bathroom mirror, bedside table, and kitchen fridge.
Being around other people that affirm the things you value is crucial to keeping yourself on the path you want to be.
If you are around people that are overemphasizing physical appearance, or other qualities that don’t align with your values, then you may find yourself starting to shift your values so that you can fit their standards.
Hillary McBride, a therapist, speaker, and author of the book, “Mothers, Daughters, and Body Image,” (which we highly recommend grabbing!) speaks openly on her journey of healing from an eating disorder. She credits finding a group of women that would affirm her, just as she was, in playing a large role in her recovery. She tells a story of finding this bold group of feminists who were vocal in reminding her that she is good and worthy of taking up a lot of space. Finding a tribe that loves you well and sings these affirmations back to you will help you to remember that you are so worthy of all the love.
We know it’s not always easy to remember your worth.
We hope that this article was a gentle reminder that you are made of love.
You are deserving of habits that help you create a life overflowing with love for yourself and others.